Jessica, Shannon
Michael, Glacier.
Raven, Amy.
Donya...

Thank you for helping me -- even if I do seem a little annoying and childish.
Please do keep in touch; I want to constantly talk with all of you guys.
Forever..

"It's like forgetting the words-- 

Eet.

Eet."

"

We've all been there. Yep. You know, where we all think about something negative, and the nconstantly think about that, and then think it all goes downhill from there? We all have thought in that state of mind before, and honestly, it's Human Nature. If you have never found yourself in a rut from that type of situation, I envy you.

I'm always surrounded by slippery slopes everyday. A lot of people, even me, consider everyone in the world to be ignorant -- actually, I can agree. A lot of people are ignorant, but that doesn't mean every single human on the earth is. Maybe we're being ignorant? Maybe they're being ignorant? You never know until you prod deep enough into the truth. That's probably kinda-sorta deep, but it's only some of the truth.

Right now, I can understand that my views will change as I grow older. I am only fifteen, and some of my friends are one or two years younger than that. Even adults I hang out with have the potential and capability to change their views. I dunno, it always happens, and it will happen until our mind can fit on set and stone with our morals.

I dunno, I dislike it when people say that everyone around them is ignorant -- and I'm not talking about the simple "Everyone is ignorant" where the person is obviously hurt and in pain and doesn't see that people are, no.

I'm talking about: "Everyone is stupid, I am correct, and if you don't believe me, your life is going to go so downhill-type of "Everyone is ignorant."

Seriously. This is why I never really express my opinions because i know there's going to be one person that's going to say something that is most likely a huge exaggeration.

But I also do not stay quiet when I feel like I can defend something for a short time.

I dunno, that's been swaying around in my mind recently, and I find it very aggravating that I could never put words into this up until a certain point.

I think I'm not the only one, though.

Why did this pop up all of a sudden?

We were talking about Faulty Arguments, ahah.

Maybe I'm the one being faulty. *shrug*

So, right now I am clearly slightly sleep-deprived, but I've been busy working on a bunch of things all morning and such. I have homework to do in about an hour or two, but recently I've been thinking about a lot of things that have been on my mind since the start of this week. 

Am I boring people?

And I'm not talking about boring them as in when I attempt to entertain them, I tend to fail and in the end damper their mood or have them do something else. I'm talking about whenever I talk to people, I'm just used as some form of entertainment and then dropped like some sort of Barbie Doll that has been left behind by a little six year old girl who recently obtained a Bratz doll of some sort in replacement. Is it possible to lose what makes you unique in some people, but always keep it with different people? Human psychology is so odd, but interesting in a sense.

But right now, it's quite depressing thinking about it whenever I actually can. One of the people I considered a really good friend -- hell, I loved them to death, blocked and deleted me after saying I "lost it" -- lost it meaning I probably lost my determination to her or something of the sort. But, when it comes to others, I'm completely determined and I try my best. If I give, then I give, but I have to keep trying y'know?

Eh. . Whatever.

Fall down seven times, stand up eight.

"Sometimes I feel as if I'm looking into nothing but Guidelines to a very void world."

Before I jump into gear with the new year and how somewhat okay it's been going so far, I'd like to let out one more rant that has been bugging me for quite some time now, and it's just frustrating to the point where I'd rather scream it out to Tumblr and Livejournal than reiterate the same things over and over again to my friends because I feel like I'm annoying them. Anyways, that isn't the big point.

The big point is: Forcing me to speak.

I am an introvert, but with that, I am also a bit anti-social, and I don't like talking to people as much unless I was introduced to them through some person in some way shape or form. But if you decide to invade into my personal bubble, then we have some sort of problem between you and me. I'm tired of people trying to sweet talk me just to get me to talk, and I hate speaking up unless it's during a class session or it's just the fact that I really feel like talking at that time. If you try to force me to speak, I'm just going to outright blow you off for the sole reason that I don't have much to talk about.

If you were to ever get to know me, I kinda contradict myself at first. I'm outright talkative when first meeting you because I'd like to see what similar interests you have. If I feel like talking to you at that day and time, then it's perfectly fine, but if I do not, please do not invade my personal space.

If I don't respond to your messages, it's because I've grown accustomed to staying quiet or not responding to IMs unless I feel the need to at that time. It's not because I hate you or anything, it's just because it's hard juggling other chats or I just really. REALLY. Don't have anything to talk about. I like to seclude myself. That's all.

And I hate it when people think I'm mad when I respond in some sort of deadpanned typing quirk. I'm not angry -- please do not assume that I'm angry.

I just really. Really. Do not want to talk.

Is that so goddamn hard to understand?

So please. Do not force me to talk,

I just might end up blocking you for an hour out of immaturity and aggravation

 

Things to Do before I go to College
[X] Go to an Anime Convention (Yomicon Counts for me.)
[X] Go to Disneyworld / Disneyland
[ ] See an Online Friend (Outside of Texas; If they live here, it doesn't count :c)
[X] Go to at least one random meetup. (DevMEET)
[ ] Go shopping. Alone.
[ ] Walk to and fro to a store.
[ ] Drop to 160lbs~

Day One
The morning went pretty smooth; We woke up as soon as possible, packed all that we needed. . . We did what was necessary, and arrived to the Airport early. We still had an hour and a half or so to kill, so we decided to go through Security early and check in as soon as possible.

Because I had never been in an Airport before -- nevertheless my brother, we were all nervous and flipping out at the place, LOL.

"How old are you ma'am?"
"I-I'M FOURTEEN S-SIR!"

. . . Yep. It went like that for me. I like the plane rides! My very first plane ride was fun -- and according to the lady that was sitting by me, it didn't seem like this was my very first time on a plane C:. I'm happy to hear that, because that would've sucked if I like. . vomited on the plane or something. Ew.

The first day we got there early. In the end, I couldn't see my friend Shannon, but the Hotel we stayed in was 2 blocks away from Disneyland. So, of course, I spazzed because I went on a fullon conversation about how it was my dream to go to Disneyland.

The only problems we had were:
1) The Yellow Ribbon event was mandatory. This event is a military thing for my brother -- but he doesn't even want it. For awhile, I didn't care, but then I realized how. . ungrateful they were to not want this. I would want it -- even if it was..redundant.

. . . At the same time, they saw this 5 times. I can understand why, too...

2) We were forced to go. I fell asleep through one of the events, but there were a few that were interesting.

3) My brother didn't have a permanant debit card, nor did he have his license on him. Therefore, he was speeding through streets (natural driving) in a rental car his friend got him. I am <i>terrified</i> of his driving.

Just sayin'. ._.;.

Day Two
So, this was the actual day of the events. Not much of it applied to me, considering I am not in the service in any way, shape, or form. The only thing that really applied to me was under the "Kids" section -- where I could go to military camp.

. . . lolno. Even if my response does sound ignorant, I'd rather stay home and focus on Schoolwork. Mmk? Mmk.

But, at the same time, WE WERE ABLE TO GO TO FRIGGEN DISNEYLAND! My brother bought half-day tickets, but they were only accessible to one park and one park only. So, of course, I chose the one with the rides: California Adventure.
Though, I did want the Fireworks + Parade. Just keep reading on as to why I would prefer the Cali Adventure.

We went on "Soarin' over California," which was a pretty fun ride. It was one of those virtual 3D rides -- where it shows the scenery as we "fly" over. They made it feel real though -- real smells and everything. The kids near my brother and I kept making me lol because of the way they were screaming and acting :'D.

We went on a Little Mermaid ride, and what was awesome was the fact that my mom was able to come along! It was handicap accessible -- as she was on a wheelchair. Therefore, she was able to get up a bit and take pictures! (I'm actually smiling, which I NEVER do.) I'll post them onto my Facebook later or so, and possibly post them up on here. I dunno.

I think the best part about that place was the "World of Color" performance near the Ferris Wheel and Roller Coaster. If you haven't seen it, it pretty much shows the good times and the bad times of the old Disney movies! We were about 15 minutes late, so we missed some of it, but the parts I did see. . .

Oh god. . I started crying, yo.

I was just thinking about how my childhood grew so much, and how I changed. . and how I'm still continuing to grow. (Actually, I'm crying as I type this!) And like, all I kept saying was "I'm not crying, what are you talking about?!"

But in reality, I felt like a little kid in a candy store. I was just like ". . ."

My mom and my bro noticed me crying, but I guess they didn't say anything about it. ///;;

The only annoying thing was near the end -- as my feet were already hurting from nonstop walking hours before since we never took a break. My other bro acted like a bit of an ass, and pretty much told me to stop complaining that my legs were about to collapse. My mom was going to offer me the wheelchair, but he sped off before my bro and I could find the exit. Eventually we did, though.

Ugh. Rant, Rant, Rant.

If I do return to any Online Games, they will always be Trickster and ToonTown. Hands down. Those two were my childhood, and. . . Well, I'm a Disney Kid. ^^;;.

I bought a Mickey Fantasia hat. C:.

Day Three
The last of the Yellow Ribbon event ended earlier today, and we just hung out in the Gift Shop and hotel for awhile longer. It sucked saying goodbye, but I didn't care. I actually wanted to go home by now. .

We had some problems with tickets, but we're all good now. We're back home.

Conclusion
Good times happened. Bad times happened. But I can safely say that I won't mind being a child at heart when I'm around other people.

. . Unless I'm required to act mature.

Teehee. Tack for Reading~

This is my last week before school starts, so I'm going to try to focus more on artwork and writing before school actually starts up again. I wanna finish up and post everything that I've done, as well as organize stuff and finish that GOD FORSAKEN CONCLUSION TO THE ESSAY!

..Nooffensetothosewhotakeitasanoffense.